#60 My Body My Story 45 Over 45 - Annie

In this episode, you will learn 10 FACTS about Annie and what she thinks about perfect body image, positive changes and challenges of 45+ women, what is it for her to feel good and look beautiful, and what advice she would give younger women and 30-year-old self!

 

10 Facts About Annie

(at the time of the project)

 

1. 54 years old.
2. Annie is UK born, just outside of Manchester.
3. Annie came to Australia for only 6 months in 1989 but stayed here. She loves it here and calls Australia home.
4. Annie has a 30-year-old son and has a great bond with him.
5. She also takes care of her 90 years old mother.
6. She lives on the Central Coast.
7. Annie is the CEO of the recruitment business. She has a company called Sprout recruitment (https://www.sproutrecruitment.com.au/). It specialises in real estate recruitment.
8. Annie has her best friend, whom she’s known for 30 years, and that longevity is something that Annie’s really proud of.
9. The biggest challenge at this age – “Menopause. Menopause, weight, menopause, moods, menopause. Menopause.”
10. Positive change with age – “I call it “give a shit a meter”, it actually just declines.”

INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT

(auto-generated)

 

Hi, you're listening to My Body My Story podcast.

I wish that I had started my own business back then, you know, but you do, especially when you're a single parent you, you know, you go for the secure option.

 

This is the 45 or 45 chapter where we celebrate rule breakers and role models, the women who inspire us to live life our way and to show that sensuality, beauty, soul and true essence. Here we talk about what it's like to be 45 Plus, adjusting to the changes that come with time, and will listen to the stories of our participants. If you have an interesting story to share, we would love you to participate, you can email us on info@aleksandrawalker.com or visit our website, www. aleksandrawalker.com

Hello, everyone, and welcome to my body My Story project and today with us in the studio Annie. And while she's sitting in the makeup chair and teachers do makeup for her, I'll be asking her a few questions. Hi, Annie. Welcome to the studio. Welcome to the project. Hi. And let's start and tell us a bit about yourself.

 

So I am 54 I am the CEO of recruitment business. I take care of my 90 year old mother and I have a 30 year old son. Wow. i We live on the Central Coast.

 

What are you most passionate about?

 

It's really hard question. Family and friends. I am passionate about I love my work. I love my life, really, I'm fairly passionate about a lot of things. So it's really hard to kind of label it down to one thing, but I can usually find passion in most things.

 

So you mentioned that you're CEO of an interesting company. I know because we spoke before the interview and I know you mentioned a bit what you do. And it's very interesting. So what is that?

 

So I have I guess two arms to the business. So I have a company called Sprout recruitment, which I also if you ask my son, he'll say he's a co founder, but I think that's probably a longbow, but then I also consult for a driver labour hire company out of Brisbane. So life's pretty busy. But sprout specialises in real estate recruitment. So we do property managers, sales agents, all of all of that stuff. So it is interesting. It's exciting to take tickets stressful champagne and razor blades.

 

So you have a good connection with the real estate agents.

 

Yeah, in the right business.

 

Okay, so where people can find you if they want to.

 

They can find me at Sprint recruitment.com.au And my contact details are on there.

 

Okay, perfect. So were you I was going to ask a few more questions about you.

Where were you born? like which area of Australia - Sydney or Central Coast? You said you lived there

 

UK born just outside of Manchester.

 

So how come you ended up in Australia?

 

Oh, it's always a man isn't it?

 

We all can relate. Citra is loving it.

 

So we get here we were I think convex or we followed someone but it's a beautiful place. I still call Australia home. I definitely do call it home. I love it here. I love my life here.

 

So how long you've been living here?

 

1989 So yeah, a long time. Yeah.

 

So you are local now. Do you go often back to UK?

 

Not often I went. So I went just before COVID And then my sister usually comes out here every couple of years for the cricket. She's just been out for my mom's 90th birthday.

 

So and your mom is here?

 

Yeah, my mum lives with me. Wow. I know.

 

You too brought her here.

 

She came over when, when my marriage ended. So my son was one. It was 1993. And my marriage ended we were both just really young. I just didn't, you know, just didn't go the distance and my mom came over to help me and she never went back. blessing and a curse.

 

That's interesting. Oh, interesting. I like stories, in countries like Australia and other countries where a lot of people came from all over the world. It's interesting to hear stories, you know, how people ended up staying?

 

I only came for six months. Yeah, mum came for three weeks.

 

Yeah, it seems like it's a common story. Like, you know, I used to live in Dubai, and everyone used to come only for two years. And like, then people stay for either… There are two options. Either people stay for more than 10 years, or they leave in the year.

 

So some people do that really weak thing as well, where they, they just can't settle in either. Yeah. So they're constantly going backwards and forwards. I've got friends like that. And it's, you know, I was thinking, why, you know, why do you need to go back all the time, but you know, I get to like both.

 

Yeah. So talking about age. We know that, with age, we get changes - positive and negative, but let's start with positive and what positive changes have you experienced so far, with, with this age,

 

I'll call it give a shit a metre, actually just declines. So the things that used to bother you, or wind, you are poor, aggravate you just let them go now. You know, there comes an acceptance of you are who you are, and, you know, like it or leave it. And I guess there's a certain amount of that. And I kind of like that. Because I was probably in my younger years, both in my career and personally, one of those people who took everything personally. And now I just shrug, it is what it is, you know, it is definitely my my call of it is what it is. There are things you can change. And some things you can't change, and you just gotta roll with that.

 

I just keep wondering why we get to the stage only with age. Is it like a tiredness from life? Or it's?

 

Well, we would like to think it's, it's wisdom. But I don't know. I think there is that, you know, I think there's wisdom. And then I think you meet so many idiots along the way that you just think I just don't want to do that anymore. You know, and I was talking to a girlfriend last week. And she said to me, do you think it's as you get older and I said, Yeah, I think you get to the point you think I have been down this road before or I have, you know, this has been my experience before and you just don't want to do it again. Yeah, you know, and life is short. You know, life is very short. You got to live every day and just get on with it and you know, embrace the joy enjoy the day.

 

Yeah, that's true. And what is the challenge with this age for you?

 

Menopause. Menopause, weight, menopause, moods, menopause. Menopause. Why do these things always start with men? What are they got to do that? You know, it's crazy. Really. They're in charge of everything. I can that be right.

 

We know that's not right. I hope your husband is not listening to this. He's not listening to you.

 

He's in charge. Now. He's really in charge of everything. Yeah. So

 

What would you say was your greatest accomplishment so far?

 

My family definitely. I have a great bond with my son. You know, he is we called him the golden child. But you know, he is he is my one and only two. But you know, we're still strong. We still talk every day even though he's now moved out a marriage. And he's not a mummy's boy. He's just, you know, we just have a really strong connection. So I'm really proud of that. My family, keeping everybody together. My business. You know, I started that during COVID who starts a recruitment business. Since the second month or so, I love that and I'm really proud of like, my, my family and my friends. And you know, my best friend I've had for 30 years. And I just love her to pieces. And I'm not saying that we never argue, but you know, we've, we've weathered the storm, and that longevity is something that I'm really proud of.

 

Yeah, that's, I also have only one friend of 30 years. And I know it's hard with age, you just realise that, how hard to meet like minded people and to become friends.

 

Yeah, really, an adult friendships and relationships are hard. You know, they're not as easy as they were, when you were, you know, 20 or, you know, everybody's got responsibilities, you know, everybody has different things that they need to do. And they are hard managing the time is hard.

 

I heard a few times during this project, that it's hard for women of our age to establish new connections, you know, like to find not even friends, but people whom they can be in touch on a regular basis and just spending go for a coffee or lunch or chart, you know, and I was thinking how hard it is, generally, to find your people but with age, because you said,…What is the term you use? Shit meter?

 

give a shit meter.

 

Yeah, so you just don't want to invest in other people, you know, because you've been hurt. You know,

 

Yes, I think it is hard. And I think you know, COVID is put that extra pressure on people as well, you know, but where do you go to? You know, they should have like, not that I've ever been on this ever. The ship like Tinder for friends. It's hard. You know, because a lot of people, I found that when I moved to Australia, a lot of people make their friendship groups fairly early on in their relationship. So like when they're at school, and those relationships carry on throughout. So it is it's difficult to meet, I guess, like minded women, who, you know, it doesn't always have to be serious all the time. You can have just coffee and a bit of fun.

 

Okay, you got me thinking now, about this new way you want to do Tinder for friends? will call it friend.

 

Okay, join me? Yeah.

 

Let's do it together.

 

That's how you know you've been the witness.

 

Facebook started somewhere in the garage, or actually Facebook started in Harvard.

 

 

That's true. Yeah. So

 

What advice would you give your 30 year old self? If you could meet her? What would you tell her?

 

Take the chances. I think, you know, take the opportunities as they come along. And don't second guess yourself would definitely have confidence in your ability. I wish that I had started my own business back then. You know, but you do you especially when you're a single parent, you you know, you go for the secure option, or the regular money coming in and things like that. And I guess that, you know, timing is everything, but back yourself would definitely be one of my things. And listen to your mother.

 

I think we had Terry on the podcast who, who would say to herself same -  listen to your mother?

 

Not always, but just maybe a little more.

 

So what advice would you give younger women who will eventually undergo this age changes, but they're still young at the moment?

 

Don't look at it as if something that's never going to happen? Because the chances are, it will I thought I was going to be one of those people that kind of moved through it and you know, I get to 60 anger. I don't even remember when it happened. But you know, I would say embrace it as well and embrace the liberation that it gives you. But take care of yourself and take time out for yourself because I think that's all part of the process too. And find out what works for you. You know, for some people, it's, you know, different therapies and things like that. But yeah, I would find what works for you and live your best life. would probably be it for me.

 

So if we would talk about body image, Where do you think this idea comes from? And of perfect body image?

 

Really interesting. It's a great question. I don't think it particularly is the media or maybe it is the media. I think fashion, and not necessarily how that's depicted. But you know, the sizes have got smaller and smaller, runways have got smaller and smaller, and the media only puts out what's in there. I just think that unrealistic expectations, you know, we live in a world of filters, surgery, augmentation, you know, a mum, my mum, if I ever listened to her would say, people these days are never happy, you know, they always want more, they always want to look different, they, you know, they, you know, they want all of those things. And, I don't know, I think it's a whole a whole range of things that have impacted on the body image. You know, my, my other half has an 18 year old daughter. And I know, that was huge. Like, when she was 14,15, 16. And, you know, we have this thing, we can just go eat a burger. But you know, it's, it's unrealistic images and expectations of how people should and could look, yeah, I mean, who looks like the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills every day, unless you're getting hair and makeup done every day.

 

And I think also, it's like, when someone is trying to influence you, you have to have…, it should be a good receiving base, you know, like, if you don't think of yourself as a fat person, nobody can persuade you that you are. And I think partially it comes from inner insecurity which cultivated by, you know, peers, relatives, media, whatever. But the beginning, the beginning of all this story is the inner insecurity, or self image you perceive yourself, you know, like, I think that listening, so many women answering this question, and most of the women say it's media, but I always ask myself, okay, but media, it should be a ready base, so they can affect you like nothing. They're not that powerful. You know.

 

I think as well, like, if you look at, I guess how things have changed, like over the 10, the last 10 or 15 years, and I think a lot of people, both male and female, have self image, I guess dysmorphia, because we're kind of living in this land where it's all instantaneous gratification, you know, and we, so we will talk about our friend for a while or Tinder? You mean, that whole thing that whole business model is based on? Do I like the look of this person? Yeah, it's no wonder that people are insecure, you know, if you're, if somebody is knocking you back, left, right and centre, just based on one picture or two pictures, then that surely has to impact on your ego? And how you feel about yourself. Yeah, you know, and, you know, we are quick to make judgments on on things these days. Whereas, you know, I guess, years and years ago, you would meet somebody, you would meet somebody in a bar, you would get talking to them, you would, you know, and then it's not just it might be an instant, yes, I liked the look of you, but now it's, you know, like, your nose might look a bit too big for me. So I don't even know what swipe left or right is but you know, do you not, I mean, it's, it's kind of like you're making this snap judgement on a person just by the way that they look. And there's filters, this and that, you know, are we ever happy? What is happy? So it's, I don't know, I think that that's got a lot to do with it.

 

I have a development idea of this business, but so that's gonna be picture-free or once you find out pictures, it's funny that the photographer would suggest it,

 

like dating in the dark. It's a great concept behind a TV show, you know, I love watching stuff like that because they're, they're not making their judgments based on how somebody looks. It's, you know, yeah, and that's to do with friendships, so you can be friends with

 

With the person looking any anyhow, so I think the main feature is gonna be, you know, exchange of jokes ideas, you know, based you will find friends based on that. Yeah. I mean, it's it's fun, isn't it? You know, like a lot of relationships they go, you know, when I when I first met my partner and you know, it wasn't instantly attractive, but then we had something in common and the relationship grew from there. And I guess the whole Tinder thing and whatever else there is out there takes that away, because you're going straight to the Delete. Yeah, yeah, slim mobile phones and cameras, you know, there used to be nothing better than taking your roll of film in and waiting three days, and then getting all the dodgy photos back. Whereas now you get one way slightly, your eyes are slightly closed, and delete. So there's very rarely a really bad photo or a random moment because they're all selfie duck face. You know, so that the random ones with bits of lemon sticking out of your mouth and looking not your best obsolete these days.

 

So what it would be for you your perfect body image for your let's put me other way what it would be for you your perfect body?

 

Sympathise.. still visual? Still visual? As in person who would have my perfect body?

 

Or yeah, for you. You say, Okay, I have perfect body now. So how it would what it should be.

 

So you can go first it should be healthy. And strong. Yeah, those are the two things. But then I'd like then advise and let's squeegee menopause belly. But you know, I think that's another thing as you as you get older, you know, you have to take care of yourself. And, you know, if you're carrying too much weight and it's becoming a health risk, then you have to take care, but you know that squeezing into things that don't fit and is it a 10,12 or 14 just become less and less important? Really? Yeah. The health and strength piece? Definitely. Way more in?

 

Interesting question. I hadn't really thought about it before apart from the thighs. Yeah, because I think that when we realise that, okay, what my perfect body? And why I want to be thinner. Is that because I want to fit into my favourite clothes? Or because if I'm moving 10 kilos more, but I look healthy and fit. Why do I need to lose weight? Yeah, that's the question. Yeah. And it? I think that's a really interesting one as well, you know? And which ties into the whole body image piece, you know, if I am thinner, will people love me more? If I am thinner, with longer hair extensions, will I get promoted faster? You know, so it is it's, will I find better? Partner? Will I find a better partner? Will that person that doesn't particularly like me now like me, then, you know, that's, that's a really ridiculous kind of self expectation really, isn't it? You know, that you're altering yourself and who you are. So that somebody else might like you more? I mean, if I've learned anything, or for somebody else whom you haven't even met, yeah, exactly. You know, and I think that, you know, when I was in my 30s, and 40s, and RSVP was the big thing then, but you would actually meet people but you know, and it was like, Oh, that person didn't like me, is it because my bumper is too big or because my arms a bit fungibility, or you know, all of these things, but ultimately, that probably says more about them than it does about you. But it is what it is. And I think I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin. Now as I've got older. You know, we're a bikini on the beach or by the pool if you don't like it don't look. Very few people will ever remember. Remember that large girl that we saw in the bikini they don't say that well as soon as you go on they don't even remember who you are. So you know where what you want to do what you want within reason.

 

What does it mean to you feel? Feeling good and looking good and what comes first?

 

I think that feeling good has to come first. You know, looking good money. Having said that if you look good, then you can feel good. And that can change your mood. All tied into one for me because you can look great but feel really terrible. Yeah. And you can you know, feel great, but look really, Rosa

 

I don't know. So it's interesting that on Sundays when I feel good, I look at myself and I like my body. So I look good. I feel oh my god, I look good. But two days later, when I don't feel that, well, I look at myself and I don't like my body. So it's like, it's the same budget, nothing changing today, just your mindset. Yeah, yeah. So that's interesting. Mindset is really interesting, though, isn't it? It's like, you know, should I eat that? And the guilt that goes with like food and fun and alcohol and things, you know, how will that impact my body? You know, I shouldn't I think that we live in the land of guilt.

 

Oh, I can't eat that cake. I shouldn't eat that bread. I shouldn't do this, you know, unless it's a healthy thing. You know, you never know when this this time on earth is your last. So whilst taking care of your body, you still got to enjoy it. And I noticed that with age, the body reacts faster, and I can understand signals, it signals better. And so my measurement now is how my body feels like, Oh, how I feel if I drink that. And I don't feel well next day. So I don't want to or if I eat this, and I feel myself like bloating? Yeah, I don't want to eat that. So what if I drink and I feel good. So that was good for me. Like it's, you have to, I think, listen to your body what it says but you have to learn. Yeah. And I think that's what we don't do when we're younger. Because we just keep going. You know, the body might not feel so great, but still do it anyway. It's like, when you buy a new car, it can manage anything. Yeah, but it's to do like how you look after it and do the maintenance or not. And that's some people end up five years with a very weird old car and bras panels need to pay the panel beating and spray paint.

 

Okay, so what makes you feel the most beautiful?

 

Oh, wine? No.

I love I love getting dressed up. I love looking pretty. I don't know. That's, that's, that's such a hard one. You know, the, the superficial of the, you know, I'm loving the makeup and the hair and you do you always feel more super confident, and beautiful when that is but what makes you feel beautiful. Has to be the way you think as well.

 

You know, it's a bit like that, you know, the movie shallow hell, you know, if you're having bad thoughts, then that kind of manifests itself out. Whereas if you're enjoying life, and I think that radiates through as well. So I think Joy Makes You Beautiful to fun humour. You know, I think all of those things combine to make you feel beautiful. Not sure if that kind of got me to where I needed to. But I think I probably need to think a little bit more about that one. Yeah, feeling happy, I think yeah. And content. You know, there's a lot, there's a lot to be said for being content, you know, not just in search of the next thing. It's, you know, being content or this one, we are being happy in your own skin. You know, there has to come a point of that where you're not constantly reaching for something else.

 

 

And my last and favourite question, if you have any favourite quote about being a woman,

 

I think it's specifically about being a woman but you know, it is what it is. “Move on”. You know, I think Have you ever watched that movie? He's just not that into you. Yeah, I love this. Women need to work that out sooner. Yeah, you know, men need to work that out too. But yeah, it is what it is. Live your life. Love it. And enjoy

 

Good one. Thank you. Thank you very much. I love the conversation. And I hope you will enjoy the rest of the day in your photo shoot.

 

I'm looking forward to feeling beautiful.

 

If you have an interesting story to share would love for you to participate. You can email us on info@aleksandrawalker.com or visit our website, www. aleksandrawalker.com

This is the 45 over 45 chapter of MY BODY MY STORY podcast, where we celebrate rule breakers and role models - the women who inspire us to live life our way and to show their SENSUALITY,  BEAUTY, SOUL, and TRUE ESSENCE.

 

For more information about the project visit:

https://www.aleksandrawalker.com/45-over-45

 

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