#52 My Body My Story 45 Over 45 - Tina

In this episode, Tina raises awareness about the Cervical cancer, she is facing at the moment. You will also learn 10 FACTS about Tina and what she thinks about perfect body image, positive changes and challenges of 45+ women, what is it for her to feel good and look beautiful, and what advice she would give younger women and 30-year-old self!

 

10 Facts About Tina

(at the time of the project)

1. 49 years old.
2. Tina is born and raised in Sydney. She loves the city. She’s a city girl.
3. Tina is a mother of five young adults - 3 sons and 2 daughters.. She had them pretty quickly from the age of 20 to 28.
4. She is the oldest in her family and got four younger brothers. So Tina is used to being around a lot of boys and men.
5. But at the same time, Tina was always the smallest one.
6. Tina is a professional in a male-dominated electrical industry. She’s a purchasing officer in a wholesaler.
7. When Tina and her family face hard times, they all come together, they fight together, and they laugh together through it.
8. Tina is facing Cervical cancer at the moment but keeping on top of it so far. As it has already been in her family history, Tina started doing the screening early and regularly.
9. The biggest challenge at this age – “It's the physical changes.”
10. Positive change with age – “All the wisdom I have now, the knowledge that you have, and the confidence.”

INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT

(auto-generated)

Hi, everyone, and welcome to my body, My Story project. And today we welcome into our studio Tina. And while she's sitting in the makeup chair, and Citra is doing makeup for her. I'll be asking her a few questions. Hi, Tina. Welcome to the studio.

Hi, thank you.

And tell us a bit about yourself.

I'm a 49 year old mother of five young adults.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. I had them pretty quickly. From the age of 20 to 28. So yeah, I've had a very busy but rewarding life. I am a professional in a male dominated industry.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. But I've also got four younger brothers on the oldest. So I'm used to being around a lot of a lot of boys and men.

And what is this industry?

Oh, it's electrical industry. I'm a purchasing officer in a wholesaler.

So you're the lady boss

I am the lady boss. Yeah, I love my job. I love it.

So what are you most passionate about?

I'm most passionate about my family. Family is everything. My children inspire me every single day. They give me strength. They've they live through adversity and have taught me how to do so as well. Without laughter I don't think I could have gotten through half the things I've got gone through.

So what you said that you were you were very young when you had your first child. So what is it for you motherhood being a mother and such a young age? And you know, was it a difference between having your first child and then eight years later, your fifth one? So is there any difference?

Massively. I was quite I was 20. But I was a very young 20 year old. I feel pregnant. Yeah, when I was 19, I had him when I was 20. And so the difference between the first to the last is that I was in a very, very different place with my last child. I actually found the first one probably to be better. And because I had a complete nervous breakdown after I had my last chart.

Oh, god.

Yeah, so that was quite difficult. But, but in saying that through all of that, no matter how sick I was, it was always in the back of my mind that I had to get well very quickly because I had young children who needed me ,I had a newborn. So yeah.

So how did you manage with five kids? It's not like eight years between first and the last. It's not that much, you know, considering the five. So how did you manage like, did you have help? Or you did everything by your own?

I was with my husband for 14 years. And so we kept we shared the parenting role obviously. We also had a business we ran from home, which, which does make it easier. We shared both roles. I never found being a mother stressful. I never had anxiety about that. I been the oldest of five kids. My my mother looked upon me to also help her. So I did a lot of baby sitting and so it just came very natural to me. So I never, I never struggled with it.

So I've always had this question like, I know, I know that all the mothers answered the same way. But I'm just wondering, like, because I'm having only one child. For me, it's always interesting. Is they all like you do you have a favourite one or you love them the same or how it's this love you You share between five of them. So how it happens?

Yeah, it's I know, when I, when I was pregnant with my second, I thought, Wow, I love this child so much. How am I going to give the my second child all that love as well. But surprisingly you do. You really, really do.

So you have an endless source of love for your kids.

Absolutely. And they're all got their own little individual personalities, they all bring something to the table. And they're all very, very funny. They are really, really funny. And they all just so strong. And they stand on their own. And yeah.

So you have sons and daughters.

I do. I have three sons and two daughters. So I had my son first then my two daughters, and then my last two boys,

Who helps you more boys or girls?

Oh, girls. Oh, actually, I don't know. My oldest son has always, always been there. And my youngest son, also. And actually, you know, they all help.

That's how we find out that the same as this love. You have same amount of love for everyone. Yeah, they also have it.

That's right.

That's interesting. And you were born in Sydney?

Yes. In Sydney. Yeah.

So it's your city. And you were born and raised here.

Yeah, born and raised here. I love it. I love the city. I'm a city girl. I do love, you know, the beach and the bush and things like that. But I always come back to the city.

It has its own vibe and moods.

it does. And it holds such memories for me as a child. You know,

So everyone knows that with age we change. But what positive changes have you experienced so far at this age?

All the wisdom I have now, the knowledge that you have, and the confidence, I was always a scared little girl. You know, I was always full of life and quite bubbly. But there was always that I always had this insecurity about myself because I was always a smallest. You know, I always had that stigma, so to per se, but, and I was worried about what people thought. Now I don't I really don't care.

So why do you think it happens? Like ask different ladies or other ladies about that, but we didn't find the answer yet. So why we just suddenly stopped caring when we turn 45-50 Not before? What changes?

For me, I think it's trauma I do. Because with part of the healing process is really reaching inside of yourself. And, and finding that inner strength to keep going on and along with that I think naturally comes you don't care what people think of you anymore.

So as soon as you go through some serious tests in life, then you just realise that the main focus shouldn't be you

Absolutely, nothing else matters, really. Everything else is just really, really small stuff. So all the stuff that I used to worry about you know, I really didn't need to

And when you say trauma do you mean like relationship or health or what it was related to?

A family crisis? Crisis? Yeah, my son as being you know, biggest fight of his life since 2018 and it crushed us all…sorry

if you if you don't want to talk about that we can skip that part.

Yeah, it's quite um, I mean, I do. I don't mind talking about it's just a very, it can be a trigger for some people.

So how did you, you and family managed? you come together in these or everyone has to go through their own processes?

Or we come together. We fight together and we And we laughed. We do laugh through it. You know, we make light of a terrible situation. You know you have to

So, what is the biggest challenge at the moment for you as a woman of this age?

Well, physically, it's the physical changes. I mean, menopause is around the corner for me. Hasn't happened yet, but I'm just in the process. Yeah. I'm pretty sure I'm Peri menopausal. Also, I'm gonna cry again.

That's okay. We're here for such an emotional conversation sometimes. Yeah. Yeah.

So I'm facing some… I'm facing hysterectomy. With partial removal of other lady parts. Due to cervical cancer. That disease killed my mother. And yeah, that's, that's a big step for me. Yeah. It's major. And if my mum have had that surgery, it would have saved her life.

So you're doing it in the nearest future?

Yes. I just had another biopsy on Friday, no, Thursday, Thursday. So every year, I seem to be going back and having things removed from that same area. So my surgeon and I are now seriously discussing the surgery. He was quite happy to do it 12 months ago, but he said, You are the area is, is now compromised. And that will need to be removed, we can't remove the one without the other. It'd be pointless. So he said you have time on your side. So I had 12 months to think about that. So I've just, I've decided to something I need to do. Especially for my kids. I don't want them to, you know, bury me at such a young age.

That's a very sensitive subject. And I think the decisions we have to take. But you know, in that case, like you have five kids, and you know, it just for some psychological reasons, we're thinking like, Okay, if it's something removed, I'm not that anymore.

Absolutely. And it's a fair thing. It's, you know, you're going to be okay, you do but me because the alternative is far, far worse. So, yeah, so you've got to weigh that up.

And you think he thinks got the medicine reach the stage or level that it can be treated at least this way and save lives?

Absolutely, if you keep on top of it, it can save your life, you know?

So do you just do surgery, and then or you have to combine it with the medical treatments as well ?

At this day, just surgery, thank goodness, because Cervical cancer is so easy to treat, if it's caught very, very early. Luckily for me, because of my mother, I have kept on top of it, checking it, checking it, and it's so rife in my family. And we're so lucky in this country that we have screening in young women, as well. Other countries don't have it and women die. You know, it's terrible disease.

Everyone should do it. Once they have the opportunity. They should definitely go and screen.

Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, watching my mother go through her treatment was horrific. And imagine actually going through that. Yeah, you know, she was desperately sick.

So what if you could go back in time and meet your 30 year old self? What advice would you give her?

I would say to her that “You have survived all what you had up to this point. It's preparing you for what's ahead. And for that part, you have to be brave. And some days you don't think you'll survive it, but you will. And there's nothing you can't do”. Yeah, that's what I tell her.

What would you say was your greatest accomplishment so far?

My kids. Definitely. Without a shadow of a doubt. Everything else is just material stuff. You know,

If you could give advice to younger women, because you have young daughters as well, who will eventually undergo the age changes we're going through now? What would you tell them? In advance?

Yeah, in advance, I would say to them, you know, while we don't like the wrinkles in the, in the tummy that we get, embrace them be thankful for it because some women don't live long enough to age that that long. I mean, I've had a friend who was in her very early 30s, who died from breast cancer who left a very young daughter. So be thankful to get old to get old. Really, yeah. You're able to bring up your children or your child, watch them grow, watch them, get married, have grandchildren, you know, all those things that we all take for granted? Some, some people don't get that opportunity? Yeah, I would say just embrace it.

So very good advice. So if we go to the subject of a body image where do you think this idea comes from of the perfect body image, and what it would be for you a perfect body?

Our social media plays a big part in, in body image, especially with young women, you know, all the influences. These, these young women probably have to just realise that, you know, like, everybody, we put a lot of work into our bodies. Yeah, definitely social media. And my body, my Pert, my perfect body would be a very flat stomach. I mean, that's what I used to, and I'd love to have that back. But I don't think that's going to happen and that's okay.

So, what does it mean to you feeling good and looking good with what comes first?

Or feeling good. For sure. Because you have to be healthy on the inside. Because it reflects on the outside your glowing skin. We smile marks we feel good and more you smile, the more you look good.

Yeah. So what makes you feel the most beautiful?

My family and my friends. That let me just be me, you know? Yeah, none of that matters. I'm just quite unfiltered anyway. Yeah, I love to just put on some makeup to my hair on a cute dress. I feel quite good, then. Makes me feel really good.

So you're in the right place to

definitely make up goes on the better I'm feeling.

And do you have any favourite quotes about being a woman?

I do. It's long, but I'll keep it short. I would definitely say that there is nothing. There is nothing that you can't do as a woman. Absolutely nothing. The world is your oyster.

Yeah, that's true. Wow. Thank you very much. Thank you for sharing your story for raising awareness is such an important subject.

I thank you for having me.

And I hope you will enjoy the rest of the day during the photoshoot. And you will have a blast today.

I'm sure I will. Thank you. Thank you.

If you have an interesting story to share would love for you to participate. You can email us at info@aleksandrawalker.com or visit our website, www. aleksandrawalker.com

This is the 45 over 45 chapter of MY BODY MY STORY podcast, where we celebrate rule breakers and role models - the women who inspire us to live life our way and to show their SENSUALITY,  BEAUTY, SOUL, and TRUE ESSENCE.

 

For more information about the project visit:

https://www.aleksandrawalker.com/45-over-45

 

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